How did I get here?

May 28, 2008 at 7:52 pm 3 comments

     People have found this blog in various ways. About 50-75 people visit daily, and for the most part, I have no idea who they are. But they leave a trail; a trail that makes me wonder if they are getting what they need from “What We Need.” The website keeps track of the google/yahoo/[insert your search engine here] searches that land someone here at my humble online abode.

     There are comical searches, such as “he’s not giving me what I need in bed,” “does God say touching breasts is wrong?” and “how to present a giraffe to a preschool teacher.” There are ones that make me wonder how in the world they ended up here, such as “we need one car to take him to the city” and “why babies make spit bubbles.”

     The ones that really get to me, however, clearly come from people who need something from their search. These searches are probably like the desperate ones I used to put in early on with C when we had no idea what was going on with him. “Help, I think my child has autism.” “Is sensory integration disorder considered autism?” “Preschool street signs obsession.” “Hypotonia, sensory integration, failure to thrive.” “How do I get my child the help he needs?”

     I imagine a parent, late at night, exhausted but unable to sleep, perhaps worried about an infant or toddler who was premature but hasn’t caught up like preemies do. They are wondering why their child lines up his trains in perfect order, why their child seems to have constant tummy aches, or why their child opens and closes doors continuously. It seems that some are wondering if the first diagnosis of one thing will really end up being autism after all. It’s a scary time for a parent, because while I don’t think we expect our kids to be perfect, we expect things to be perfect for our kids.

     While raising C has been nothing like what I expected it would be, I wouldn’t change him for anything. He has so many gifts, so many amazing qualities, and so much to offer the world. I can’t say it’s all been easy, not even close. But the benefits far outweigh everything else. So whoever you are, sitting out there, staring at a computer screen and wondering what it all means, I hope you’ve gained some comfort here.

Entry filed under: autism. Tags: , , , , , , , , , .

When all else fails Going Postal

3 Comments Add your own

  • 1. robinaltman  |  May 29, 2008 at 2:36 pm

    I really enjoy hearing a parent’s perspective on their special needs kid – particularly a parent who appreciates and treasures their child. It’s so nice to read – particularly on a rough day, when I’m ready to retrain in dermatology. So, feel good. I’m certainly getting what I need here! Except for birthday cake. I could use some birthday cake….

    Oh, dear LORD, does cake SOUND GOOD! My doc has me on this weird rotation diet for food allergies and I miss food. Dermatology, huh? No middle of the night frantic panic calls, but you’d have to look at grody things on people’s bodies. Yeech. Anyhow, thanks for visiting again! I’m glad you wandered over here!

  • 2. Good Fountain  |  May 29, 2008 at 6:09 pm

    Interesting. A lot of people find my blog via searches for Sensory Seeking and Social Stories.

  • 3. gayle  |  June 14, 2008 at 3:08 pm

    I found your blog by way of another blog; that is the trail I usually follow. I have wandered the maze of autism for over the milestone 100 days now, and the only thing that helps me when I need a lift is the blogosphere. I started just as you described, i frantic searches trying to figure out why I didn’t believe the pediatrician who told me everything was fine or the quack specialist he first suggested. I knew before the developmental pediatrician told me that my son is a quirky guy who defies the usual expectations of autism but certainly is NOT “NT” (as I’ve learned to say). Blogs taught me what I wanted to know. I found a handful that resonated, and I read them all the time (mostly lurking), and then sometimes I follow their breadcrumbs to other blogs. And YES, I absolutely got what I needed when I found yours recently. Another person who makes me think. Another person with similar experiences. Another person who gets it. It makes me feel good to find kinship, and sad that there are so many of us, and amazed that I never knew squat before my son, the rooster, came along. Thank you for blogging.

    Wow. Thanks so much for visiting. I know exactly how you feel. It wasn’t until I found groups online that I really felt someone understood! And now blogging it’s amazing who you find. And it amazes me too how little I knew. It is very nice to find like minded folk who just get it from the start. Thanks again for the kind words.


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