Missing in action

January 15, 2009 at 9:50 pm 10 comments

     Tonight while C was taking a shower, I decided to try to expand on the things he does for himself while bathing. He’s pretty good at washing his belly, but that’s about it. I told him to wash his arms, legs and bottom crack. “What crack, Mommy? What are you talking about?” I reached behind him and touched the top of his derriere to see if he could feel what I was trying to explain. Silly me, have I not learned anything? This is a kid whose body awareness ranks right up there with, well, I have no idea, but suffice it to say HE has no idea. He still misses ankles and elbows most of the time I ask him to find them, and calves are baby cows, don’tcha know?

     So as I watched him trying to look at his bottom, eerily resembling a dog chasing its tail, I had to laugh. Round and round in circles he went in total confusion. “I don’t have a crack, Mommy! People like me don’t have them! Is it from a gun? WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT, MOMMY?!?!” Nothing I did could convince him. I showed him my own (yup, dropped trou right then and there – I have no modesty left since becoming a mother), and held him up to the mirror backwards to see if he could see it.

     Nope, no crack. Nuh-uh. No way, no how.

Entry filed under: autism. Tags: , , , , , , .

Playdate jitters But once a year

10 Comments Add your own

  • 1. looksgoodinpolkadots  |  January 15, 2009 at 11:43 pm

    Oy That’s Funny!

    We don’t have issues finding the body parts… proper use of language is a problem. I’ll say, “Wash your BOTTOM” and she’ll start squealing, “Wash my BUTT, wash my BUTT, wash my BUTT.”

    I remind her that we use a nicer word like, bottom or heiny… she doesn’t care.

    I’m so laughing at you dropping trou and trying to show C where the crack is… tehe.

  • 2. Holly's Mom  |  January 16, 2009 at 2:42 am

    Your post “Cracks” me up!

  • 3. T$  |  January 16, 2009 at 6:07 am

    maybe he thinks something will leak out…

  • 4. Jesch  |  January 16, 2009 at 6:53 am

    Oh my, that’s a hoot.
    T$: get my face off your post 🙂

  • 5. pixiemama  |  January 16, 2009 at 7:17 am

    Yes! This is classic Foster, too. He only knows of three body parts – belly, penis (why, oh, why! did I ever teach him the name of that part?) and, courtesy of his charming classmates, butt. But! He doesn’t even know what a butt is.

    This body awareness issue is one of the weirdest things for me. This kid who can do 3rd grade math and has an adult’s vocab doesn’t know where his elbow is, regardless of how many times we’ve shown, played, tapped or talked about it…

    I totally believe you dropped trou to show your crack, and I bet it was in utter exasperation. Like, “See? See! SEEEEEEE?”

    Oh, maybe you’re more patient than me.

    Okay, I have to one-up you on “penis.” We used “dooder” at first, not recognizing a huge first time parent blunder. Yup, it stuck. Sheesh. We’ve tried to switch it with “penis,” but that one is hard to remember for some reason….

    Isn’t that dichotomy so interesting? That they can multiply 13 by 13 but don’t know how to find their own ankle? I am just intrigued by that. I wish I could just get inside his brain for one day – I know I’d be such a better Mom to him if I could!

  • 6. T$  |  January 16, 2009 at 11:59 am

    i can’t help it jesch. must be associated with the email. get your face off my post!

  • 7. robinaltman  |  January 16, 2009 at 3:33 pm

    Hahahahaha! You’ll be hearing about cracks for weeks. Come over to shrink rap. You have a groovy award coming to ya.

  • 8. mama mara  |  January 16, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    Just wait until you get a note from school reporting that C is telling everyone about Mom and her crack.

    Yup, I’m definitely expecting that one. Either that or CPS knocking on my door saying they’ve heard reports that I exposed my child to nakedness.

  • 9. goodmum  |  January 17, 2009 at 8:02 pm

    “Is it from a gun?” HAHAHAHAHAHA This tickles me something awful tonight! 🙂 Thanks for the giggles. Does he know “buttocks?” Little Man knows this word, so we just tell him his “butt crack” is the line between his buttocks. Of course, the emphasis is on the wrong syllable whenever he says “buttocks,” so we, being the most mature parents EVER, try to get him to say “buttocks” a lot. It’s our entertainment…

    Okay, I can’t help but think of Forrest Gump when I hear the word “buttocks…” I know you guys think I’m fixated on Forrest Gump, but COME ON!!! 😉

  • 10. mommy~dearest  |  January 20, 2009 at 11:14 am

    OMG- that is hysterical!


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